It’s 3.11am on a Sunday morning and I’m in the bath trying to ease back pain. Would say back ache but that really doesn’t do it justice.
With my belly very swollen and my back throbbing like I have been hit by a car. I wonder when I will get to sleep.
My partner is in bed with a 12 hour shift ahead of him and I don’t wanna wake him and complain of my pain. He wouldn’t mind of course but I would knowing how tired he will be tomorrow.
I have a bedroom to move round later today. Tried to do some yesterday did half of it before I was out of breath and hurting.
THIS IS MY BAD WEEK (10 DAYS)
But hopefully I will get the prostap injection this week. That helps ease the pain slightly. But will eventually kill my ovaries and I will have no hope of saving any eggs.
The injection itself comes with drawbacks and acts like chemo does. I will loose some hair, be sick and my immune system will all but disappear. Its the price I pay to have less pain.
Things I have found out this week…
Love isn’t dead.
Don’t push away the ones that love u the most.
I have a seizure before I become unconscious.
This week I will learn that doing it alone as a parent is gonna be the hardest and most emotional thing I will ever do. But it will be worth the most.
This week I have kept my kids pics with me and I have missed them so much. But come Monday I will have them in my arms.
Being a parent is about trying ur best no matter what the situation. They may not have everything they want but they will always have whatever they need. Xxx
